Uncontroled
by kawaii-bird
Summary: Lina admits how she feels about love and Gourry tells her he loves her AZ, LG
1. Chapter 1

Dunno where I'm going with this, just read some stories and random ideas popped into my head so dunno how well it'll turn out.

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We all sat around the fire as it slowly died. It was about 3 am. Not that I had ever admitted it, but the man I loved was sitting across from me. Zel had his arms around Amelia and whispered something in her ear. She giggled and turned her head to kiss him. Tears swelled up in my eyes and I couldn't help but wish I was in the same situation. But not with him...Gourry. I had never liked someone before and I couldn't believe the first person, I liked this much. It was overwhelming. I quickly wiped the tears from my eyes before anyone saw but it was too late. Gourry saw and was about to ask. He got up and walked around the fire to sit next to me. He gave Amelia and Zel a look that said 'give us a minute alone' and they got up and went into a tent. Gourry put his arm around me and rested his head on my shoulder.

"What's wrong?" He whispered into my ear. The hair on the back of my neck stood up at the sound of his voice and I didn't answer. "Lina, I saw you crying..."

"I wasn't crying!" I said not too loud but louder than normal talking.

"Well I could tell you were upset..."

"It's nothing, you wouldn't understand." I took his arm off my shoulder. If he came any closer, I might do something I would greatly regret.

"Who's to say?" He was still whispering and every time he said something I got goose bumps.

"It's nothing!" I was starting to raise my voice. He sat there in silence for a while knowing I just needed time to calm down.

"Well if you ever need anything, or just to talk... You know I'm here" He got up and started walking towards the tent

"It's just..." I said softly just as he reached the tent. I saw a satisfied smile cross his face but quickly left when he knew I was looking. He slowly walked back towards me and sat down. "I can't stand it when I see them together... You know? I've never had that and I've always wanted to know what it's like. To know someone's there for you know matter what. Someone you can talk to and not fear being judged. The feel of someone's arms coiling around you and knowing they love you more than anything in the world and you feel the same and you never want to leave." By now, the tears that had swelled up in my eyes were silently falling down my cheeks. "I want to know what that feels like. I want..." I stopped when I felt his soft hands wiping the tears from my face. They traveled from my cheek to under my chin. He slowly lifted my head and looked into my eyes. Not looking away once, he moved closer and closer to my face. I felt his soft lips touch mine. I shut my eyes taking it all in. I didn't know what to do other than accept it.

He pulled away as slowly as he came. "Lina... I love you." We sat in silence for a while. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to breathe or talk or think or anything... He loved me, and I loved him, and it's been a huge secret I've wanted to tell him forever but scared he wouldn't feel the same. But he does, and he told me.

"I love you too." I whispered.

He came close again and once again I felt his lips collide with mine. I felt his hand on my waist slowly move up and down my side. I put my hands on his shoulders and shut my eyes enjoying the soothing motion. I felt his hand move higher than it had the time before. The fire in front of us finally died and his hand moved up off my side and grabbed my chest. I let out a small gasp not expecting this but he didn't stop. He continued rubbing my breast and I broke the kiss gasping for air. He moved his hand to my side once more but instead of coming up my side he went up my shirt. He hungrily kissed my neck as I was breathing heavier.

"Gourry" I whispered "Gourry stop." I don't know why I said it. I loved everything about that moment. The feeling of his hands on me, his soft lips running up and down my neck but I wanted more. He stopped and pulled away. "Sorry" I whispered and ran into the un-occupied tent.

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Well not as bad as I thought. I was gonna have them take it farther but lets get some drama in first. R&R


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Slayers

Ya, last chapter came out better than expected lets see how this one goes. I love writing, but it doesn't always work the way it should

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I woke up the next morning with Gourry next to me instead of Amelia. Then it all came back, everything that had happened the night before and I felt awful. I rolled over and looked at Gourry who seemed to be sleeping peacefully. I kissed him lightly so I didn't wake him and thought once more of the night before. He let out a small groan and I quickly and quietly got up and left the tent. Amelia was already outside.

"Hey Lina!" She greeted cheerfully "How was your night? You look awful!"

"Hey Amelia" I replied "Don't wanna talk about it and I'm sure I look just as bad as I feel"

"Here," she said handing me a cup "I made some tea."

"Thanks Amelia" I took the cup and sipped from it. It was really good but for the first time in my life it didn't seem appealing. I DIDN'T WANT FOOD!!! Never thought that was going to happen but back to reality. I took another sip and looked at Amelia. She had a wonderful glow to her this morning and was much moor cheery than usualy.

"So could of happened that was so bad last night?"

"It's not that it was bad I just don't want to talk about it. What about you?"

"OH!" she jumped and turned red "Nothing... just a normal night..."

"Then why didn't you come back to our tent last night?"

"Ok, ok. Well, um.. me and Zel... Um..."

"AMELIA!!!" I didn't believe it. She's lost her verginity! I never thought she was one to do that so early!But I'm sure if I told her she would be astounded by my events as well... but lets not tell her. "You and Zel...?" She slowly nodded her head embarrassed.

"Don't tell anyone please Lina!" She begged

"I won't." I promised. She changed the topic and was going on about something but I wasn't really paying attention. All I could think about was the night before and how bad I felt for walking out like that.

"Did you want more tea?" I heard her ask.

I shook my head "No thanks. But it was good thanks" Just then Gourry came out of our tent. I turned around gulped down the rest of my tea and ran into the tent in which he just left. I needed time to think things over.

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A little while later Gourry came in and woke me up. He gently rubbed my back.

"Lina, Lina get up" He whispered "We need to leave"

"Why?" I groaned

"Because this is only supposed to be a 3 day trip and we've been here 2 days already, we need to go so were not late." I groaned and rolled over to go beck to sleep. "Lina..."He hesitated "I, I'm sorry for last night. I shouldn't have... I'm sorry"

I was now wide awake. I rolled over and looked at him. "You didn't do anything. I should be the one apologizing. I just walked out on you like that..."

"No, you had every right to. I shouldn't have done that without warning. Or at all...It's just, since I met you, the first time I saw you. I've loved you. I doubt you feel the same and I don't want you to think I'm using you by what I did last night..."

"Gourry stop!" I was starting to get upset. Not so much mad but overwhelmed and confused "You don't need to apologize. I know you wouldn't use anyone. I know you're not like that..." I stopped and took a deep breath "I love you too, I love everything you did last night. None of it was wrong. I'm just so overwhelmed. I didn't know what to do or anything so I just left... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left I should have explained and talked to you and listened to what you had to say. If I could I'd go back and fix it all..." in the midst of explaining this I hadn't realized I had sat up and before I knew what happened we were kissing again.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and felt his around my waist but this time they weren't moving, they stayed in one spot far away from my breasts. He lent on me causing me to fall back onto the bed with him on top of me. I felt his body pushing up against mine. He spread his lips and I felt his tongue push into my mouth. I was surprised but accepted it and did the same. I felt his hands begin to move but they still weren't leaving my waist.

"Gourry" Zel came in" Are you two... Never mind" He quickly left

Gourry and I stopped and he came off of me. I could feel my face hot from blushing. I wonder if he'll tell Amelia. We both straitened up and came outside where everything had already been packed up.

"Finally!" cheered Amelia. "You must be a heavy sleeper Lina." She gave me a look that said 'I know what you did and I wont say anything just secretly bug you' and I gave her one that said the same.

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Theres the second chapter. Thanks everyone for the reviews. Only one bad one so far and thats a record for me! not the best in the world but good enough for me. And I', not sure if I should put this but what the hell. most of this so far was from experience but I don't think any more of it will be. Summer break I don't get to see my bf. I'm sad. But enough of my personal life. R&R


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Slayers

Ya, no more from experience... and I'm not that much of a slut for anyone who thinks so or adores gossip!

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Along the way, Amelia and Zel were too caught up in each other to notice me and Gourry holding hands. Not that they hadn't figured it out already... Especially Zel... but I'm sure my sudden jerking away when they looked over didn't help. Every time Amelia looked over she gave me a look of congratulations but I just ignored it.

"Are we setting up camp tonight or are we going to keep going?" asked Zel

I looked at Amelia for what she wanted and of course with last night's events she wanted to stop for the night. "We'll keep walking I said. I was in an evil mood all of a sudden... Oh God, moodiness... the last thing I need right now is pmsing! But was it pms or was I just mad at her for some unknown reason? Oh, well. Who's to say?

"Come on Lina. Were all tired. You're the only one who slept all day." Whined Amelia. Zel stayed quiet knowing that wasn't all.

'if you keep whining it's going to be another night too' I thought "Fine!" I said though, raising my voice and she knew not to bother me any more about it.

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We set up camp and Amelia and Zel immediately went into one of the tents leaving Gourry and I alone once again. I looked at him suddenly feeling sad. I felt tears swell up in my eyes and quickly blinked them away feeling them start to burn.

"What the matter?" Gourry asked concerned. Looking into my eyes.

"Nothing." I answered truthfully

"It had to be something." He said softly, still looking concerned. He brought his hand up to my face and stroked my cheek with his thumb.

"I just get like that sometimes..." I said but didn't finish hoping he would catch on. But of course what jellyfish brain would? He looked at me confused. "Just... it's nothing" I said.

He pulled me towards him, his hand still being under my chin and kissed me lightly. A sensation ran through me like I've never felt before. I opened my eyes slowly not realizing I had closed them. I lost balance and stumbled backwards a bit to feel his hands catch me. He looked into my eyes with pure love. I wanted more but knew it would ruin the whole thing. Still not able to walk properly, I stumbled to the pile of wood that had been cut and put a couple pieces in another pile to start a fire.

"What's for dinner Lina?" Amelia asked coming out of the tent.

"What are you catching Amelia?" I asked back thanking no one in particular under my breath she hadn't come out earlier.

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Well it's coming along. 3 chapters, 2 make out scenes. Damn why couldn't that be my life. Well that's that chapter, would have been longer if it wasn't 11:30 at night but whatever.

R&R


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own Slayers

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"Amelia you're keeping watch first?" Gourry asked

"Umm..." she hesitated looking at Zel. He gave her a small nod "Ya, sure"

Gourry came into the tent with me leaving Zel and Amelia alone this time. I lied down on the bed exhausted. There was only enough room for one person so Gourry laid half on top of me. I giggled and he looked at me surprised. I don't think he's ever heard me giggle but the expression left his face as I rolled onto my side and made room for him. I was turned away from him but I felt him pull me close to him from the waist. I could feel him breathing heavy near my ear and tightening his grim around me.

"I love you Lina and nothing will ever change how I feel about you. I never want to let you go. I want to be there for every problem you have and I want to catch every tear that falls from your beautiful eyes. I love you more than you'll ever know." he whispered in my ear. I felt him playing with my hair a bit.

"I love you too." I whispered too quiet to be heard but he kissed me lightly on the cheek to show he knew I felt the same way.

After a bit I fell asleep with his arms still around me. He must have stayed and kept watch for me too because I missed my turn and he wasn't beside me when I woke up. I got out of bed slowly and headed out of the tent. Gourry was sitting on a log near the fire alone.

"Amelia and Zel are still sleeping." He said "But I advise you not to go in there and get them up."

"Why?" I asked confused

"Um..." he hesitated

"Again?" I asked he was quiet. I let out a sigh "I'm going to go find something to eat" I said. He put his arm around me and kissed me lightly.

"Don't be too long." He smiled. I smiled back knowing what he wanted and left.

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By the time I got back everyone was sitting around waiting for me. Gourry eager for food and Amelia and Zel sitting, arms around each other, staring at Gourry who was panicking I may not have found anything. I threw a fish at him to get his attention.

"FOOD!" he cried when he saw me. I gave him a look of disgust when he came closer. He hugged me and pecked me on the cheek before taking it all.

"You know that's for everyone!" I hollered as he ran off

"I know" He called back

"And I want some too. I caught it. I get more!" I caught Amelia rolling her eyes out of the corner of my eye and decided I would take some of hers instead of Gourry's.

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"Hey,' I said through a mouthful of food "Lets stay here another night." I said "This is some good food!"

"Agreed" Gourry mumbled, his mouth full as well

"Why not?" Amelia sighed in agreement

"But Lina?" Protested Zel "What if someone finds out where we are. Were putting ourselves in great danger" He said intelligently.

"So what. Have you trued this or not?" I threw another piece at him.

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I've finally figured out where I'm going with this. Finally! Only took 4 chapters but what the hell. R&R


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own Slayers

This is going to be a rather... Adultish, dramatic chapter.

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The food wasn't the only reason I wanted to stay. Gourry would soon find out.

We spent the day going for walks and just having fun. We've never done this before but we agreed on doing it again some time.

"Lina shouldn't we get back?" Asked Amelia "It's starting to get dark."

"Do you only care about your sex life?" I scolded she turned red and I could see the tears forming in her eyes. I felt guilty and like a hypocrite knowing I was going to head back soon for the same reason. "Lets go" I sighed.

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Gourry was first to keep watch tonight and then it was Amelia. I was last. I waited in the tent for Gourry. He came in and had a dumber expression than I have ever seen on his face before but it quickly left and he came over to me. I was lying in the bed with nothing on.

He came over and looked into my eyes "Lina... are you sure you're ready?" he asked softly. I was more than sure.

"I love you." I whispered. He kissed me lightly and began to take off his clothes as well.

Very carefully he laid on top of me and Kissed me lightly but hungrily. Just like the first night I felt his hands move up my sides onto my breasts. He squeezed them lightly and I let out a small moan against his lips slowly moving my hand down towards his lower half. I hesitated, wanting to touch him but unsure he wanted me to, when I felt his hand take mine softly and moves it closer towards him giving me enough time to pull away if I wanted. I just hind of held him and sharply pulled away. He took advantage of this and kissed me some more moving down to my neck. I knew he was going for my breasts next and felt tears forming in my eyes. Was I ready?

"Gourry!" I gasped suddenly sobbing. I had just stoped him from taking my breast into his mouth.

"Lina? what's wrong?" He asked looking as though he was going to cry himself for what he had done to me.

"I-I'm not ready..." I whispered " I thought I was but-but I'm not. I'm sorry"

"Don't be sorry." He was looking into my eyes again when he said this "I'd rather wait until you're ready than rush you into something you don't want." He kissed me lightly once more before he got off of me and got dressed.

He finished getting ready and headed out of the tent.

"Where are you going?" I asked

"I'll keep watch the rest of the night, probably best to leave you alone." He answered quietly and left.

I heard him say something to Amelia and cried myself to sleep.

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I was up really early the next morning and headed out seeing Gourry wasn't in the tent. I got ready and headed out of the tent.

"Amelia! Zelgadiss!" I half yelled half sobbed when I got closer to the fire. They came running out to see what was wrong. When they saw, they stood there watching me cry on Gourry's dead body. He was lying face down with knife marks all in his back.

Amelia crouched down and rubbed my back. "Oh, Lina." She whispered "I'm sorry"

I threw her off me and rolled Gourry over. There were a few more markings on his front side as well. I threw myself on top of him kissing his cold lips repeatedly. Finally Zel came over and pulled me off him. I put up quite a fight but eventually gave in. He carried me bridal style to my bed. I just laid there and sobbed for a while.

"How could he do this?" I demanded

"Lina... You think he wanted to?" Zel began. I knew this was going to be quite an explanation "He loved you more than you'll ever know. By the looks of it, it was a surprise attack and he couldn't defend himself." I was now crying on Zelgadiss knees. He rubbed my back lightly. "Come on Lina, there's not much left to go to get to your parents" He helped me up and supported me the whole way, leaving Gourry's body behind.

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When we got to my house I went to my room and slept for who knows how long. When I woke up my mother said it was abpout2 days but I didn't care. The only thing I cared about was the dream I had. Gourry was in it. "I'll always love you whether I'm with you physically or mentally" he had said "I'll always be in your heart. Just be happy and continue with your life" that was the last thing he ever said to me, whether it was a dream or not, he said it, and I treasured it.

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Well that was a long chapter. Dunno why I wanted it to end like this. Just depressed I guess. Oh well. Hoped you liked it

R&R


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